Yesterday, I almost quit my job. I was so pissed off by the way things are going and almost decided to quit. I’m glad to have reminded my self that decisions made while on the peak of strong emotions are usually irrational. Huh! I almost gave in!
Guess I have some room here to discuss. Well, it all boils down to the tiresome preparation for the Congress. I’ve been doing everything for the last how many months and somehow it has taken a great deal of my life. It was tough, but still manageable. As the big day approaches, the more sedulous the tasks have become. Tired. Stressed. Frustrated. Depressed. That’s been me lately.
The other day, I was preparing everything needed for the orientation of our Convenors and facilitators for the Congress workshop. I had very little time to complete them but still I finished. I’ve been coming early to and leaving late from work to get all things done. And yesterday, I was there very early to check on everything and finish whatever’s left to do. To my surprise, while I was working on a document they handed to me the very last minute, my boss noticed that the margin of the other materials was too small to be clipped. OMG, The MARGIN! Just the margin which no one will ever pay attention to. I felt so frustrated hearing that as my concern was the content of the material and the completeness of all the documents. The margin really didn’t matter to her before but for whatever was with her that time, she clamored about the margin. She did not even warn me that we have to clip them together in the first place. That was too much for me. Felt it was so unfair. As if my effort and hard work was gone to waste just because of wrong margin. If I had not controlled myself; I could have resigned that instant.
But God is good. After lunch, everything was well again. Goodness. And I was able to wear that smile. Honestly, I almost forgot all about the margin until I got home.
You may think that I should really find another job. I thought about it even before this Congress thing came up and realized that I really like being part of the Center, being a researcher, a part of the university, helping my country in our modest way. It’s tiring and requires a lot of effort, but somehow I love it. Perhaps what’s causing me this stress is the bulk of work and the pressure that comes with it, or at times, my colleagues, but I shouldn’t concentrate my eyes on the hurdles. A friend told me that what matters most is if it satisfies what you really want. There’s a part of me that agrees. I believe I should really agree. I just have to keep my self compose until this project is over and I know things will be alright soon. Just a few days left. I hope you add me in your prayers, too. Thanks.
2 comments:
Wow! So you can get pissed off huh? I've never seen that side of you before. But we all have that side in us. Just based on what I know about you, you have a great work ethic. Patty has that too. She stayed at her other job too long. She was so stressed out about that job that our doctor even gave her medication. Thank the Lord that she got this other job now. She is much happier. It almost sounds to me like they don't appreciate what you bring to the job.
Anyhow, I pray that the Lord will reduce your stress level, grant you favor in your job, and shower you with all the grace and mercy from Him that you can handle. Just keep doing everything as unto the Lord. I pray that He will guide you to where He wants you to be.
You can vent to me anytime you want to. :-)
Thank you. yeah, i believe i have a high threshold especially for endurance for work but somehow, maybe i just had enough for that day. anyway, it's over and i'm happy again. in the afternoon, i was laughing with my boss alright! haha!
perhaps it's part of the pressure of the event. i pray that all goes well with the congress. it's tough but i'll press on! hurrah!
i'm consciously keeping calm right now; not taking things too seriously. i'm doing better.
thanks for being a good friend from afar. i really appreciate that.
i'll keep you posted!
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